'Intelligent Falling Theory'

Evangelical Scientists take on Gravity! Courtesy of 'the Onion'.

Satire this good just doesn't grow on trees to later fall on the head of unsuspecting Isaac Newton.

Money quote:

"Let's take a look at the evidence," said ECFR senior fellow Gregory Lunsden."In Matthew 15:14, Jesus says, 'And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch.' He says nothing about some gravity making them fall—just that they will fall. Then, in Job 5:7, we read, 'But mankind is born to trouble, as surely as sparks fly upwards.' If gravity is pulling everything down, why do the sparks fly upwards with great surety? This clearly indicates that a conscious intelligence governs all falling."

Sweet